Tired of ‘splainin’

On days like today it’s easy to see how the idea and ideal of the nuclear family is embedded in my psyche, despite my months of trying to get used to/be content with my status as a single mom.
It’s even harder to swallow our status when I see how it affects my children.

Today was one of those days where the contrast of “before” (intact, nuclear family with its occasional rough patches and frequent feelings of contentment and joy) and “after” (frequent rough patches and occasional feelings of contentment and joy, but none with the depth that I felt before Mike’s death.)

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Here I am

Well, didn’t mean to drop off the face of this blog for so long. Thanksgiving, school fundraiser, Marley’s birthday, travel to NM, Christmas, New Year’s Eve, general malaise, and now Facebook have all turned my attention away.
Besides, I was beginning to feel like a broken record.
Things are……..pretty much the same, except, as of late, my mindset. Am feeling a lot better despite the fact that my houses aren’t selling, the stock market sucks and I am teetering on the edge of financial disaster. Dear God, lets hope Obama can turn some of this around.
Anyway, I am trying to be more social and have some fun while I wait for things to change for the better.
The kids are doing well in school; I’m working there pt now. I’ve stopped renovating my house in Avondale until my house in Crestwood sells. Thats about it.
Just building my profile in Facebook and anxiously awaiting the chance to throw beanbags at a Bush effigy at Bottletree next Tuesday evening. I had to show the kids the shoe-throwing video on You Tube and now they’re pumped to throw some beanbags, too.

Would-be 11th wedding anniversary blues

At first, I blamed it on PMS.  That slightly edgy, not-so-good feeling.  Then yesterday, November 17, I wrote a check for $11 and all of the sudden it hit me: November 18 would have been our 11th anniversary.

Instead of celebrating, I am trying to live in the moment and trying not  to project anything too far in the future, lest I get panicky.  I feel stuck, like I’m spinning my wheels and not really progressing at all.  Read the rest of this entry »

Averyisms

Two good ones this week from the lips of Avery.

#1) “Trick or treating is stupid. Halloween is for wearing costumes.”

#2) “What kind of meat is pepperoni made out of?” (I told him cow meat) Pause. “Why do cows have pepperoni in them?”

Dia de los Muertos reminder

Just a reminder that Day of the Dead is this Sunday November 2 @ Bare Hands Gallery.  Kids activities from 1-4.  Celebration through 10pm that night with wine, beer, food.  One of B’ham’s greatest community events.

Come!  Mike would want you there.  And so do I.

SOLD one. $$ to you and Redmont School if you refer me a buyer for East Lake invesment property

BTW, I did sell my junker Avondale property.  No profit, but it feels good to unload something.

So, the Crestwood house and the East Lake rental/investment property are still for sale (see two entries ago).  I will haggle a bit more on these two, esp the East Lake one.  Nice little cash flow machine, that one. Read the rest of this entry »

Praise the heavens for sweet potatoes

It’s amazing how booking a one-day job with a new photo client makes me feel human again.

The national news media and I have been doing a wonderful job of presenting nightmarish economic scenarios that have left me on the verge of a breakdown the last two months. Read the rest of this entry »

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